Mliaeah......

I'm waking up...*sighs*...I'm so tired....Insomnia has power over me again.

I look on the window...The sun...the sun is making his way to the sky through this darkness...*soft breath*

Stars.....I hate them...Stars are related to hope...hope is related to faith...I despise it.

I open the window...a little bit too shy...*inhales*...A breeze hits my face and I feel energy surging inside me...*exhales*...

How IDIOTIC..*pfft*..useless....why do I feel like number one from time to time...I can't understand it..

I'm trash....*sigh*....A pathetic excuse for filth...just like everybody else...We are all filth, trash that should be erased.

How boring...this world...it's so dull...so foreseeable. It's simply has no magic whatsoever...Miracles! What a bunch of bullshit...Fate is even more stupid...We are bound to have a foreseeable life...doomed to stay within our own habits, our own cycle.

My name is...not important I guess...let's just take a dull name like this world....Okay from now on I am " This World". So.....my name is "This World". I'm a high school student..sort of...never mind... I used to be a cheerful kid..mostly and I got hurt...by a lot of people in a lot of different ways...Scars that will always be there...typical I say some stereotypical shit. Anyways...now I'm devoid of any emotion...It's a curse and a blessing in more than one way...A curse because everything became dull...When you become impartial you tend to observe a lot more things. A curse because I see how idiotic people are....I see filth that have god knows how many schools finished...and I can do a better job than them...So stupid....Filth should be killed...useless humans should not have the right to live...Everything is so useless...*pffft* *laughs*....like i care.. This is the blessing I do not care about anything...things just come and go...I'm merely the observer that observes this stage of the world...Nothing special...in a good way or a bad way...I just exist...

I walk to the fridge...take some eggs..some meat. Omelet..Share 50-50 with Robin...I look at it and I'm not really hungry...I get up to put in the fridge....Robin stops me...he shows me his plate with his paw...He's still hungry..I give it to him...I take my leave...I stop in the park and look at it....I sit on a bench. 9 o'clock...good enough. I see some gamblers....they fight over money....stupid...I never understood it....the hunger for money...This...This....It just shows how filthy we are....isn't that right..."Father"?

Intrebare....

Bun am ajuns intr-o situatie destul de ciudata in care ma intreb de ce traiesc? Ce inseamna tot ce am facut pana acum...? Cu ce rost traiesc....daca nu iubesc, daca nu urasc, daca nu am sentimente? Inca imi amintesc ziua in care mi-am pierdut sentimentele si implicit cand am incetat sa mai fiu om...In definitie inca mai sunt om...dar tot ma intreb uneori de ce joc teatrul asta? De ce trebuie sa fiu asa ipocrit? Pentru ce...? Pentru cine? Pentru mine? Ma indoiesc....As vrea sa fiu un nor...Ar fii simplu...sa plutesc, sa nu gandesc.. sa nu fiu constient..pur si simplu sa exist si nimic mai mult. Ma intreb pentru ce traiesc altii....ce motiv au? La cei mai multi adulti am auzit ca traiesc sa iubesca...E adevarat ce au zis...chiar pot sa am incredere in ei ca nu mint? Daca as putea, as spune ca sunt patetici. De ce...sa iubesti...E iubirea asa importanta incat sa mori pentru acest sentiment? In opinia mea...nu. Pentru ce consider eu ca ar merita sa mor? Glorie...Pentru a ramane in istorie timp de mii de ani, de ce nu timp de zeci de mii de ani. Pentru asta sa mori. Dar aici intervine o alta intrebare importanta....E ambitia mea sa raman in istorie sau este a altcuiva....? Am avut vreodata o dorinta proprie? Sigur ca am avut insa erau nesemnificative....acele dorinte nu pot sa ma faca fericit in momentul acesta. Si in nici unul ca sa fiu sincer. Ce intrebari....de baza pe care orice om si le pune si isi raspunde la ele....numai eu nu...Presupun ca asta ma face sa ma simt gol...mizerabil..Nu stiu termenul exact pentru cum ma simt. As fii insa curios sa vad daca intr-un final o sa ajung la o concluzie...Daca o sa am un raspuns....